Jennifer Mulford of the Atlanta area is thrilled to have entered into an Adult Breastfeeding Relationship (ABR) with boyfriend Brad Leeson.
We don't know if she made up that acronym or not, but we've all had that secret fetish at some point in our lives, are we right people?!
Mulford, 36, took time off from her job as a bartender to establish breastfeeding - which she hasn't done in 20 years - just for this reason.
Because she has not given birth to a baby since she was a teenager, Jennifer and Brad, also 36, need to "dry feed" every two hours.
Try to aim away from your computer or mobile device whilst vomiting.
The dry-feeding thing is designed, of course, to fool her body into thinking she is feeding a child so her breasts start producing milk.
Why the preoccupation with this unusual sexy pastime?
If mammary serves (sorry), Jennifer was single when she stumbled across a website about ABR, and from there, she was obsessed.
"When I read about the bond breastfeeding that could create between two people I was envious," she told the venerable Sun (UK).
"I have always enjoyed my breasts being touched during sex more than anything else so I knew I would enjoy it," Jennifer added.
With this idea in her head, she began searching for men who be open to the idea of adult breastfeeding. How did that quest go?
"When I read about the pure joy it brought others, I was desperate to seek out a partner to share an emotional bond with."
"I used dating sites, put messages on ABR forums and even put an advert on Craigslist," she says, "but I drew a blank."
"I started to think I'd never get to try adult breastfeeding."
It's tough going out there. Finally, however, she started discussing the idea with Brad, an old boyfriend from school. He was game.
"I thought it was the perfect time to bring up adult breastfeeding - and see if he'd be interested," said Jen, unable to believe her good fortune.
"We were talking and Brad told me he had a thing for big-breasted women, and that size had always been a factor in his relationships."
"It was like a light switched flicked in his head," Mulford recalls. "I could tell from his voice that he was curious and excited."
After he did his own research into ABR, he knew he wanted to be more than friends: "At that moment I knew that I had a partner for life."
"We both wanted the same thing out of the relationship - a magical bond that only breastfeeding an achieve."
Brings a tear to your eye, doesn't it?
Not that ABRing doesn't bring its own set of challenges - especially given that Jennifer hadn't breastfed for over 20 years at this point.
She had no milk to feed Brad with, so the cute couple need to induce lactation by dry-feeding and pumping her breasts every two hours.
Admit it, you're gonna try this later.
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