You won't believe this, but a Dallas man who sent a resume, job application, and photograph of his penis to a Texas company did not get the position.
He is, however, in a precarious legal position as a result. He faces a misdemeanor charge for his trouble, as the recipients were apparently unamused.
The man was hilariously applying for a position at Texas Workforce Solutions, a company devoted to, of all things, preparing clients for the workplace.
When a 25-year-old employee of the organization received the guy's application and unique letter of recommendation (so to speak), she promptly called police.
They tracked his application, which had been sent from a personal email and issued the man a ticket for "obscene display or distribution," a class C misdemeanor.
A spokesperson for the Dallas Police Department confirmed this actually happened, and said that as far as he can tell, the man is still unemployed.
"I think I know why he can't find a job," he reportedly told the Dallas Observer.
Yeah. On a related note, we know why these people are unemployed, too ...
1. @CarlyCrunkBear
Carly "@CarlyCrunkBear" McKinney, whose handle says it all really, was a 10th grade math teacher who often posted images like this on Twitter. Her employers were not happy and placed her on administrative leave. Her students thought she was pretty awesome, and protested to get her back. To no avail. She was fired in the end.
2. Taco Bell Guy
And you thought the Taco Bell breakfast menu was gross! Moral of this story: If you're gonna lick the shells, keep it to yourself.
3. Wendy's Frosty Guy
Ditto eating straight outta the Frosty machine ... though we can understand being tempted to attempt this.
4. Justine Sacco
Justine Sacco was axed from her PR job in 2013 for racist Tweets she fired off about AIDS during a trip to Africa. “Going to Africa. Hope I don’t get AIDS. Just kidding. I’m white!†she wrote. The firestorm erupted immediately and before her flight even landed, she'd gotten the chop.
5. Gilbert Gottfried
Gilbert Gottfried was canned as the voice of the AFLAC duck after Tweeting a series of jokes regarding Japanese tsunami victims. How bad were his jokes? The insurance giant canned Gottfried within the same day.
6. Caitlin Davis
Former Patriots cheerleader Caitlin Davis was released after Facebook photos showed the Sharpie-packing pompom queen posing over a passed-out pal with naughty words, pictures and two swastikas all over him. The words "penis" and "I'm a Jew" were visible. Classy.
7. Miners Doing the Harlem Shake
Doing the Harlem Shake on the job got these mine workers fired ... dancing out of their mine, you could say. Sorry.
8. Bitter Barista
We can't imagine for the life of us why a Seattle coffee company axed this apparently Bitter Barista over his blog by that name.
9. The Applebee's Waitress Who Posted This
The true idiot here is the person who wrote the note, but it's still a cautionary tale. An Applebee's waitress who was stiffed by a pastor via this receipt and posted it on Reddit actually got fired by the chain for sharing it.
10. Dayna Morales
Waitress Dayna Morales posted a receipt she allegedly received from a couple chastising her for her gay lifestyle ... only she made the whole thing up!
11. This DTE Energy Company Worker
Some rants are better off in your head than on your Facebook page, especially if you work for a utility provider.
12. An Unimpressed Palace Guard
A Buckingham Palace guard Tweeted this about Kate Middleton: "hur and william drove past me on friday n all a got was a shitty wave while she looked the opposite way from me, stupid stuck up cow am a not good enough for them! posh bitch am totally with u on this 1 who reely gives a f*** about hur!" We don't know if these comments ever got back to hur, but he got the pink slip.
13. Olivia Sprauer
Olivia Sprauer taught English at Martin County High School in Florida and modeled on the side under the name Victoria Valentine James. Her school didn't think th
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