News programs SHOULD be boring.
Their content should be dry, and their anchors should be stuffy and matter-of-fact. But, when one of those anchors is sending sexy text messages to their lover ...
Hey, let's kick it up a notch, shall we?
Page Six has published the private messages of 60 minutes' anchor Steve Kroft and his mistress Lisan Goines, who were outed last month ...
While Lisan Goines, a young New York attorney, is quite sexy in her pics, the naughty talk of Kroft leaves something to be desired:
"Dress in Washington is either professional or Laura Bush."
These were Kroft's wardrobe instructions before their meet-up at the DC Park Hyatt in 2011. He follows it up with ... "Don't dress like Beyonce'."
DON'T dress like Beyonce'?
I'm sorry, Stevie, but these words should never be written or said allowed, ever. EVERYBODY should dress like Beyonce'! Always! ALWAYS STEVE!
Now that Steve Kroft's affair has been exposed to the public, he is doing some much needed damage control to save his marriage of 23 to fellow journalist Jennet Conant.
But meanwhile, we are left with a set of very unsatisfying sexts from a gross old-guy who can't keep up with his young hottie side-piece.
GOINES: "Wanting to taste you again"
KROFT: "Same here"
Same here? Jesus.
KROFT (cont'd): "Stem to stern And all the delicious spots Inbeteren"
I'll forgive the typo, but can we avoid the 1950's nautical lingo?
GOINES: "Gonna explode if I can't have you soon…"
KROFT: "Very hard playing golf with A bulge in my pants."
Golf, Steve? We're talking about GOLF now, the least sexy thing on the face of the earth?
On his 69th birthday, Goines texted the obvious pun: "Wanna act ur age?:)" Which Steve immediately proceeds to not get at all, and responds with "Old and grumpy?"
Steve, she's talking about oral sex.
Guys, I am constantly disappointed with the lack of balls in the modern day news world. But I am REALLY disappointed in the lack of balls in the modern day news world's sex life.
Let's get it together, Kroft!
Really, everyone else on this list is just playing for second place.
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