BREAKING NEWS from Harper's Bazaar:
Kim Kardashian is every bit as boring as you would imagine her to be.
The magazine has run an exclusive diary of a typical day in the life of the former Kim Kardashian sex tape star - and it includes such fascinating tidbits as where Kim keeps her phone every night and how often she emails.
SPOILER ALERT: Kim Kardashian emails a lot.
You can visit Harper's Bazaar's for the full Kim breakdown, but here are some highlights lowlights:
6am I sleep with my Blackberry, my iPhone, and the baby monitor next to my bed... I check the monitor, and then I kind of squint and look at e-mails. I don't respond to them right away; I scroll through. The first person I talk to is Kanye because he's right there next to me in bed.
6:15am I go for my run. I live in a gated community with lots of horse trails, so I run on those, or on the treadmill in our home gym on the other side of the house.
8am I'll usually have scrambled eggs or oatmeal, or a protein shake with fruit. Kanye loves to eat really healthy and is always on different diets. He has a chef who comes in the morning and cooks breakfast for both of us and gets our meal plans together for the day. We just started seeing a nutritionist who changes our diet every 10 days.
EDITOR'S NOTE: We've so far learned that Kim runs on horse trails, has a personal chef and a personal nutritionist. It's hard being a mom, people!
9am I love baths... Dr. Lancer makes a good hard body scrub I use. And I just started using this black bar of face soap by Erno Laszlo.
10am If I'm working or filming that day, I'll have hair and makeup done at the house. That usually takes an hour and a half. If I don't get breakfast earlier, I'll eat then and respond to e-mails. Everyone always e-mails me late, before they go to bed, which is after I fall asleep, so I don't want to wake them all up by e-mailing too early. My favorite mode of communication is texting.
11:30am [Filming] We don't really get breaks because we have three crews and they switch to get their breaks. We break only if we eat, if we break at all.
12pm When we're not filming I'll have one or two meetings a day, usually starting at noon.
1pm I prefer to have the chef make my lunch because it'll be healthier. Lately it's been fish and vegetables, or chicken and vegetables, something like that.
2pm I can't live without talking to my family. I'm obsessed with them. We're on group chats every single day.
3pm If I need a sweet-tooth fix, I'll have those Justin's peanut butter packs; the almond butter is also really good. I'll just eat it plain. I used to drink a ton of iced tea, but I've cut back.
EDITOR'S NOTE: In the last three hours, Kim has eaten a lunch cook for her by a personal chef, texted and then eaten dessert.
7pm There's nothing I love more than getting to stay home all day and not get ready for anything, which is about half the week. And then we have Sundays off. I usually spend that day with my daughter, and we'll go somewhere. I love driving, being in my car and listening to my music.
9pm Once the baby's asleep, I like to unwind by getting in bed and doing some work. I'll put on a robe and answer e-mails or go online.
EDITOR'S NOTE: Answering emails or going online constitutes "work."
11pm I always put my hair up and use makeup wipe to wash my face off, and I apply facial oil or moisturizer before bed. I go to bed around 10, 11 at the latest. I always fall right to sleep. I'm usually so tired, I just pass out.
How can she not? That day sounds exhausting! Can you imagine if she had to cook her own food ever?!?
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