The birth of Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds' first child recently captivated the celebrity gossip world, and not just because their daughter hit the genetic lottery.
North West. The spawn of Kimye being named after a direction may be the dumbest thing in human history. At the same time, if she doesn't grow up to have a signature fragrance called North by North West, this is not a planet we wanna be living on.
Kourtney Kardashiand and Scott Disick went relatively conventional with their first two children Mason and Penelope. For the third, however, they opted for a name fit for a Lord: REIGN Aston Disick.
Yes, Miley's real name is Destiny ... which isn't necessarily a bad thing, but Billy Ray and Tish probably guaranteed she'd become a stripper someday with that moniker.
Ironically, Apple is both the name of Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin's daughter and likely the name of a food item forbidden in some rich crazy-person diet she probably follows.
Nicolas Cage named one of his kids Kal-El, a fact not related to him being wasted out of his mind in this mug shot ... although that could explain a lot of things.
Not only did she torture us with The Reader, Kate Winslet is making her newborn's life terrible with Bear as his name. Alicia Silverstone chose this name too. And she chews up Bear's food for him, which is also interesting.
Blanket Jackson is not actually the name of the youngest child of Michael Jackson. It's Prince Michael Jackson II ... not to be confused with Prince Michael Jackson I (also pictured). As for his nickname, he was wearing a Blanket while MJ dangled him over a balcony. Good times.
Suri Cruise, the child of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, is a bona fide cutie. Who will have to spell and explain her name approximately 10 times per day as an adult.
Jessica Simpson named her little daughter Maxwell. Perhaps she is trying to overcompensate for giving her an old man's name by putting her in this bikini.
Banjo, the son of Rachel Griffiths and Andrew Taylor, is not only named after a musical instrument, but probably the most absurd one to name a kid after you could think of. With the possible exception of oboe.
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Perhaps most notably, world-famous one-year-old and unanimous first ballot Celebrity Baby Name Hall of Fame inductee North West needs no introduction.
Ditto her newborn cousin, Reign Aston Disick.
While they are certainly among the more notorious examples, Kourtney and Kim Kardashian are far from alone in their dubious baby name selections.
Nor are they even among the most absurd. Some celebs' chosen monikers must have stemmed from dares, lost bets or a parlor game of Can You Top This.
That or they were on drugs. Either/or.
We weren't there for the discussions between expectant parents about these names, or for any of the substance abuse that may or may not have preceded them.
You have to give them credit, though.
Whether it's a self-aware, ballsy commitment to being cuckoo and/or total aloofness and lack of concern for their children's well being, these people went all in.
No one can take that away from them.
Who else has hereby been enshrined in the Celebrity Baby Name Hall of Fame along with North and Reign? Scroll through the gallery above to find out.
And just to prove that this isn't a celebrity-only thing by any means ... check out a bonus slideshow of regular folks with names you won't even believe below.
The Pope and Oprah's illegitimate child? Wishful naming on the part of the parents that she'll either grow up to be the second richest woman in the world or the leader of the Church?
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