The world was briefly distracted by last night's clown car GOP primary debate, but now we can get back to focusing on the much more momentous occasion that's sure to shape the course of human events for decades to come.
Yes, Kylie Jenner's 18th birthday is almost here, and that mixture of fear and anticipation you're feeling is perfectly normal.
In fact, Kylie's older sister Kendall would like you to know that you're not alone. Allow her to set your mind at ease by showing you her butt.
Actually, we're not totally sure if that's Kendall's butt. But it's someone's but - and Kendall posted it on her Instagram page today, along with a caption reading, "Weekend vibes #KyliesTurning18ImScared"
To be clear, Kylie doesn't turn 18 until Monday, so you don't have to spend the whole weekend glued to your phone, waiting to find out if she'll elope with Tyga or pose nude for Playboy.
Frankly, we think it's ridiculous that it hasn't been declared a national holiday and we're all expected to just go about our business like it's any old Monday.
You didn't hear any of the candidates talking about that pressing issue last night, now did you?
Anyway, Kylie will no doubt do some partying on the big day, but the real festivities are going down next weekend, when she celebrates her birthday in style at Beachclub in Montreal.
The drinking age is 18; the bubbly will flow like Labatt's; and Kylie will carry on the proud family tradition of making obscene amounts of cash just by showing up and partying at nightclubs.
We're scared too, Kendall. We're scared, too.
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