Consider this disturbing fact: The couple will likely squeeze out at least one child.
Sheen - who is already paying $110,000 PER MONTH in child support for his kids with exes Denise Richards and Brooke Mueller - tells TMZ that's very open to impregnating Rossi. Just not yet.
And, hey, if anyone knows about illegal activity... it's Charle Sheen!
The Anger Management star also says Brett has spent time with twins Bob and Max and that all sides get along well with each other.
Sheen doesn't plan on making Rossi sign one (they "poison" marriages, he believes), summing up his take on how he prefers to handle splits with this classic Sheen sentence:
Would you ever marry Charlie Sheen? No, right? Brett Rossi can't say the same somehow.
1. Charlie Sheen Rolling Stone Cover Would you ever marry Charlie Sheen? No, right? Brett Rossi can't say the same somehow.
2. Future Husband Material? Charlie Sheen can be a funny guy, we give him that much. But would you want to marry this man?
3. Charlie Sheen Smiles Charlie Sheen smiles here for reporters. At least we think he's smiling.
4. Charlie Sheen on FX Carpet Charlie Sheen stands proudly on the FX carpet here. He is making a lot of money for the network.
5. Charlie Sheen and Lindsay Lohan Charlie Sheen and Lindsay Lohan in bed in Scary Movie 5. Pretty hilarious.
6. Charlie Sheen at the Mic Say what you want about Charlie Sheen - please! - but the actor has enjoyed a successful career. He has a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.
7. Charlie Sheen Crazy Yes, Charlie Sheen is probably a little crazy, but that's why we love the guy.
8. Charlie Sheen Smiling Charlie Sheen has enjoyed a colorful career, that's safe to say. But he's rebounded with a hit for FX.
9. Charlie Sheen Chills Charlie Sheen is just chilling here in Miami. The actor looks to be lost in deep, deep thought.
10. Charlie Sheen in Miami Charlie Sheen holds up a wad of cash in this photo, courtesy of a trip to Miami. Why? Who knows. It's Charlie Sheen.
11. Charlie Sheen Motivational Poster #WINNING. One word revolutionized the world in 2011. Charlie Sheen's mantra is far more than a slogan. It's a way of life.
12. Being Roasted Charlie Sheen has a reason to smile. His Comedy Central Roast was viewed by an incredible six million people.
13. Nice Hat, Charlie I'm not bipolar! So reads the hat of Charlie Sheen in this photo.
14. Charlie Sheen on Tour Charlie Sheen may have come to a city near you with his crazy antics and unfunny tour. Did you attend any of his shows?
15. A Friend Indeed Charlie Sheen is nothing if not a loyal friend. He just bailed Lenny Dykstra out of a legal jam.
16. Charlie Sheen in Canada Charlie Sheen smokes a lot. He lights up here following a tour stop on Toronto, Canada.
17. Charlie Sheen Party Poster Wanna throw it down with Charlie Sheen? The actor will be the focus of a party in New Jersey following a live show, as teased on this poster.
18. Sheen's Korner Photo This is your basic photo of Charlie Sheen. It's courtesy of an edition of Sheen's Korner.
19. The Look of Crazy Charlie Sheen smiles for the camera on top of this building. Who know what is lurking inside that head...
20. A Mind Lost We all know Charlie Sheen is losing his mind. But has the actor really, finally admitted to it?!?
21. What a Nut Job Charlie Sheen has been forced to hand over his kids to authorities. That move came after his ex-wife filed for a restraining order against the actor.
22. Out of Work Star Please, CBS, do not take Charlie Sheen back. He's SO much funnier when he's out of work.
23. What, Charlie Worry? Why should Charlie Sheen ever be in a bad mood? The guy can do pretty much anything and the public continues to love him.
24. Fight On Charlie! Charlie Sheen is fighting the good fight. Or something. To be honest, it's quite unclear what Charlie Sheen is doing at any given time.
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