In a word: PHEW.
Following far too many rumors of a Kris Jenner Playboy spread, this 58-year old reality star appeared today on KIIS FM's Kyle and Jackie O Show and said her birthday suit won't be coming out of the closet any time soon.
I don't think anybody wants to see me without any clothes on," Jenner told the hosts.
Many believe, of course, that Jenner pressured her daughter to strip down for this publication in 2007 and also that she was behind the Kim Kardashian sex tape leak.
But at least Kris understands that the public is clamoring to see her kids naked, not to see from where they came.
Jenner did post a bikini photo of herself last year, saying this morning she was aiming to be "inspirational" to others in their fifties.
"I love to work out and love to feel like I'm in shape and I like to feel good about myself," she said of maintaining a workout routine.

1. Jennifer Love Hewitt
Jennifer Love Hewitt looks pretty good here, don't get us wrong. But she has no major role lined up and could give her career a major boost by just baring it all.
2. Kourtney Kardashian
Let's face it, Kourtney Kardashian is the best looking sister. She could leap frog Kim with a Playboy spread.
3. Kate Upton
Simply put, it would be the best-selling issue in Playboy history. How could Kate Upton turn that down?
4. Bethenny Frankel
Bethenny Frankel is all about being a strong independent woman. So what better way to prove you still have it at age 43?
5. Clare Crawley
SPOILER ALERT: Clare Crawley does not win Juan Pablo's heart on the Bachelor. She has to remain relevant somehow, doesn't she?
6. Demi Moore
Oh yeah, Ashton?!? You wanna marry a young hottie? Don't forget what you're leaving behind!
7. Ashley Greene
Her career has stalled since The Twiligh Saga concluded. This would get back on (naked!) track.
8. Tatiana Neves
See The Girl Who Banged Justin Bieber Naked? Yeah. We have a feeling that will move some copies.
As for the love lives of her daughters, Jenner did comment on both Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom, as well as the impending Kim Kardashian-Kanye West wedding.
On a Khlomar reunion: "Khloé and Lamar are still apart. There's not really any change there that I know about or can report."
On Kim's wedding dress
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